Saw this on a wall in Vegas. I needed my own. Who else got one?

When people ask me if I really hate the cat that roams my house, I say yes. I mean it. God could not have laid upon me a more evil of a cat. I fear I have done something to upset the higher powers because no one should be left to live with this evil fucker (pussy sniper). Jarrett says he has it worse but I would argue that.

Look at him. So cute. Sleeping with his head on the desk. Yet just hours before this, while I was sleeping, he fucked up the hardwood floor with an utter display of love.

Clearly, I did not get out of bed when the sniper began crying in the middle of the night to play ball with him. (come on man. I threw around the mouse on the wire for a good while when I got in). So rather than roll with the punches, the little fucker pierced a couple of cans of Red Bull and flooded the hallway with the delicious smell of taurine. 

Strike two you little fucker. I’m not playing.