Sometimes, an outfit speaks for itself. Justin Bieber's April 17 outfit is, in that case, an utter fashion masterpiece: greyish hoodie, big white T-shirt, and two (two!) pairs of Balenciaga sweatpants stacked atop each other over $2,500 Louis Vuitton slippers. Oh, and he's rocking his wife's phone case.
I have written exhaustively about otherwise ordinary outfits worn by otherwise extraordinary people.
I have written about Justin Bieber, who has worn these exact Balenciaga sweatpants before.
I have even written about A$AP Rocky, who only just recently quadruple-layered his underwear.
And yet I have never quite been struck by an outfit in the way that I'm struck by Bieber's outfit. Not because it's good. Or bad. Or both. Or neither.
It's not just that he's wearing big sweats. We've seen that before. Many such cases, in fact.
It's that Bieber's walking ever-so casually, unbothered, having just gotten himself some lunch in Los Angeles with a friend (at Sushi Park, because duh). And, yet, Bieber's also wearing two gargantuan, expensive pairs of designer sweatpants sloppily pooled atop huge bear paw-shaped slippers designed by Pharrell.
Tremendous. Just like his pants. Both of them. "Mind-blowing" is a phrase that comes to mind.
There's just such an incredibly heroic disconnect between Bieber's outfit and his attitude. And even between the top and bottom halves of the outfit. If this isn't sprezzatura, what is? Perhaps it's even the face of God. It's like looking at a solar eclipse except it doesn't burn out your eyes. Probably.
I mean, what else can I add to this picture? Commentary is irrelevant: Justin Bieber is wearing pants on pants as if he's simply wearing, well, pants.
You'd think we'd all be inured to this. Justin Bieber wears big sweatpants all the time. It's practically his signature.
And, like, how? How does this happen? And why? For what purpose? What do two pairs of $1,000-ish Balenciaga sweatpants achieve that one alone does not? It's so confoundingly ordinary that it's actually tremendously bizarre in such a way that I demand answers.
Scientists may never be able to provide them. Even Bieber, the sultan of sweats, probably couldn't.
And yet there but, for the grace of some sweatpants-wearing god, goes he.
